Words on my mind: Intuition

screen-shot-2016-12-05-at-15-02-27A thing I’ve learnt in recent months is that you have to give yourself credit for the decisions you’re forced to make on a daily basis. Knowing whats right and wrong for yourself when you’re in a situation that could go a multitude of terrifying ways is a big ask and you’re all you’ve got. Taking risks is more than just a deep quote about only having one life, and a friend departed from the circumstances saying a flippant “just go for it” it’s putting everything you are and all that you’ve accomplished up until that point on the line. Asking yourself repeatedly “is this worth it?” without really having any definitive answer to act on. It’s such a lonely place to find yourself.

But we all go through it whether it’s deciding to pack up and move to the other side of the world, or leaving one job for another or even something as human as honestly confessing your feelings. We don’t quite notice the pressure and the magic of taking a chance like we should. When someone asks us advice on their predicament its easy to just brush it off without fully registering what it actually must feel like to them. I know I do it all the time. I pride myself on listening to my friends and their problems but when it comes down to it I can’t quite weigh the situation to the correct extremes. With this I also notice how much I take for granted that intuitive core I regard so highly in my own life. I’m always meditating on ideas and listening to that sacred little voice in my “soul”. Is this what I need? How is it making me feel? Let’s leave it to my instinct and follow that invisible little fabled creature into the unknown. It’s thrilling.

When you talk about intuition it’s often mocked or regarded as illogical, a dreamers trait. The problem is the conscious has so many outsider influences, it’s the machine behind fear and repression. The more we think the more they become a decider. The people around you, the external situations that could interfere with the present one you’re deciding on. It’s not that your intuition wont lead you astray and I’m not saying it’s always guaranteed to take you down the most successful path but likelihood is it is more connected with the present and who you are and what you need in this moment. That is never wrong. You can’t live in the past or the future, they aren’t tangible, not set in stone. Dwelling on tomorrow is the best way to ruin today and contemplating yesterday is the best way to stay stagnant. The way I regard intuition, is as a portal to who I should be, who I am right now. The only me that really matters. If it makes sense in this second and the feelings it unravels are positive then what other “reasoning” do you need? Trust a little in you.

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You’ve caught the virus

the one they spread

of toxic thoughts

and social dread.

 

Your bright eyes heavy

dulled in vain

from all the insomnia

thoughts that stain

 

Your mind it’s anxious

a trembling thread

of wicked voices

you cannot shed.

 

Your body is weary

from sleepless nights

your thinning limbs

a pitiful sight.

 

Your lip it quivers

a trembling shame

hollow cheeks

depressions claim.